Life Update: Where TF I've Been
My life has completely changed since the last time I posted on this blog and I feel like the need for an update is in order. I typically don’t share things that are particularly private or personal to my life, but this time I want to spill the details!
Okay, maybe not all the details.. but I want to recap on the crazy beautiful mess that has been my life for the last 8 months and how I’ve gotten to the point where I’m at, right now.
2018 was a hell of year. I laughed, I cried, I lost people dear to my heart and I gained people I will be grateful for forever. I learned so much about myself and I could not be more excited for what 2019 has in store.
2018 was one hell of a year
Roughly 8 months ago I made the move to Houston from Midland, and guys, ya girl was ecstatic. I appreciate the time I spent in Midland so much but it was not ever home. I wanted to be back in the big city from the moment I moved to the west TX oil patch and it was finally happening.
Then, about 3 months into our move my boyfriend decided we were moving back… Y’all I was devastated and cried almost everyday.
Now listen, I’m not trying to say Midland is a loathsome place, I’m trying to say that I knew the part of my life that was meant to be lived there was over. For me the idea of moving back felt like a step backwards. Like maybe even a leap? Is that dramatic?
Cue being faced with the decision of what to do about my relationship, what to do about the fact that I loved my boyfriend and I absolutely adored our dog.
We decided to try long distance but I think realistically the trajectory of our lives was just focused in different directions.
The decision to stay in Houston was one that came with a ton of judgement but also a ton of support. It taught me who was on my team and it forced me to acknowledge what it was that I wanted. Me! What do I want for my life.
No matter how powerless you may feel, you always have a choice.
At the end of the day, the point was as simple as this – I was not happy before and suddenly I was in my element.
Giving up my dog was absolutely one of the hardest most heartbreaking decisions of my entire life but despite how fiercely I love that little guy the truth is that on my own I can not give him the life that he deserves. That’s a hell of a hit to the ego to admit but for the sake of his life I have to be honest and admit that the responsibility of having a pet is one that I can not realistically carry out at this point in my life.
So here’s the next crazy thing, the job that enabled me to stay in Houston quite literally fell into my lap! Like guys when the universe sends you signs you just have to listen. I met my current boss on Bumble BFF (yes, it’s really a thing) and about a month after meeting her I moved in with her in an attempt (a successful attempt I might add) to get back on my feet a little before moving into a place of my own.
Basically in short, Bumble BFF sent me this wonderful tribe of women who I could not be more elated to know.
A mantra, learned from my Mom, that I’ve tried to hold in high regard throughout my whole life is this – Jump and the net will form. Meaning set the intention, and go for it! I believe that even more deeply now than I ever have.
So as a last impression of this post here are a few things I learned in 2018 and want to work on in 2019.